Collin's Letter to Austin.

A friend of mine asked: When you love someone, how far can you go to cross a moral duty to society?

Graham Greene writes in the novel Heart of the matter;
"In our hearts, there is a ruthless dictator within us ready to contemplate the misery of a thousand strangers if it will ensure the happiness of the few we love."
History and folklore have proven it. Let's begin with the story of the Trojan war between the city of Troy and Sparta over the most beautiful woman at the time, who was Hellen. Hellen was the wife of King Menelaus, brother to the Spartan king Agmemnon. Before the war, Paris the Prince of Troy while at Menelaus's court was blinded by his youthful passion for Hellen that he decided to elope with her back to Troy even when it was obvious that Sparta, by then the biggest rival to Troy, would not let such effrontery of magnanimous proportions go by unpunished. Therefore, it can be said that Paris the Trojan prince, contemplated the sack of Troy and its citizens for his enchanting new bride, Hellen.

Another example can be found in the Duke of Windsor, Edward VIII who abdicated his throne to marry his lover, Wallis Simpson, a divorcee which was prohibited for a royal monarch to do. Edward VIII had the responsibility as King to rule and oversee the affairs of the state. What greater moral obligation can supercede that of a rightful monarch to rule his people especially in turbulent times like a world war.

In our very own Ugandan experience, in the case of Bruno Kiwuwa v Ivan Serunkuma and Juliet Namazzi, the couple was willing to jettison away with the Buganda cultural taboo that prohibited them from marrying from the same clan despite both of them being Baganda. The Baganda society disapproved of this. Even Justice Remmy Kasule from Buganda ruled against the marriage of the young couple. But that didnot matter. Did it?

Therefore to lovers, the propriety of crossing the moral obligation to society can be as rational as love itself. There isn't a threshold too high to surmount, too deep to overcome. To borrow a famous quote from TV series Game of Thrones, "Love is the death of duty, duty is the death of love". But my friend I beseech you to choose duty over love. Love withers, dies. Duty rewards its servants with honour, remembrance, and greatness if you are lucky. If it ever comes down to duty versus love, choose duty over love, the later almost always ends in tears. 

Letter to Austin. From a good friend and colleague.